This showed up on my (messy ) desk today. Who wants to guess what it is...And who has ever used one?

wired

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Looks like a Do-Nothing Machine, albeit an early model. You typically find them on road crews, construction sites, legislative bodies, and government offices.
It's crazy someone brought you one. You must have been doing too much, and making everyone around you look bad.
Good job!
 
It is one of the mythical Do Nothing Machines. Also known as a Standard Timing Model. Back in the old days when you had qualified mechanics and technicians out in the world and they were looking for a job they would go in to see the plant hiring manager and the plant engineer would sit them down in front of one of those things run it through a few cycles to show them that it did indeed work . Then they would lead them out and someone would scramble all the settings on the cams and linkages and then the prospective employee would have to make it run again...with a stopwatch behind them. No pressure. The old "Black Box Test" . Several large companies still use them. I recently started a new testing regimen for industrial mechanic candidates and the VP said...hey Ive got this thing in my office . It had gotten so bad before the economy collapsed that if you had a pulse and could fog a mirror I'd hire you , try you out and fire you within days if you were an idiot. Now there are actually qualified technicians out in the labor market so I get to be pickier.
 
If you were closer I'd ask to give it a whirl.
 
I am not sure what it is but to get it running I need some ball bearings.... It's all ball bearings nowadays. Now you prepare that Fetzer valve with some 3-in-1 oil and some gauze pads, and I'm gonna need 'bout ten quarts of anti-freeze, preferably Prestone. No, no make that Quaker State.

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So that’s where the toilet paper maker went!

or

That’s the machine that makes the fully semiautomatic machine assault grenade mutilator rifles with the thing that goes up!
 
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Man that is the brains of the "Way Back Machine". See the arrows on the handle? Just crank it the other way and you can go back and fix anything. Just spray it with some of that Lysol first and take those big channel locks with you just in case. LOL
 
Im with BrianK - I think it'd be fun to try it out. Watch it work for a few, and then see if I could figure it out.
Might fail, but it'd be cool to try
 
It is one of the mythical Do Nothing Machines. Also known as a Standard Timing Model. Back in the old days when you had qualified mechanics and technicians out in the world and they were looking for a job they would go in to see the plant hiring manager and the plant engineer would sit them down in front of one of those things run it through a few cycles to show them that it did indeed work . Then they would lead them out and someone would scramble all the settings on the cams and linkages and then the prospective employee would have to make it run again...with a stopwatch behind them. No pressure. The old "Black Box Test" . Several large companies still use them. I recently started a new testing regimen for industrial mechanic candidates and the VP said...hey Ive got this thing in my office . It had gotten so bad before the economy collapsed that if you had a pulse and could fog a mirror I'd hire you , try you out and fire you within days if you were an idiot. Now there are actually qualified technicians out in the labor market so I get to be pickier.

We have one similar. Use it for new candidates for "line adjusters" i.e. mechanics on our equipment.
 
Im with BrianK - I think it'd be fun to try it out. Watch it work for a few, and then see if I could figure it out.
Might fail, but it'd be cool to try

Wer'e going on vacation next week to Hilton Head. I'm going to bring it with me for my sons and to play with and figure out at night.
 
Gosh, I thought that it was a Turbo Encabulator...

That's great, I always wondered how long it took him to memorize that. I found the YuuToo note,
"This is the first time Turbo Encabulator was recorded with picture. I shot this in the late 70's at Regan Studios in Detroit on 16mm film. The narrator and writer is Bud Haggert. He was the top voice-over talent on technical films. He wrote the script because he rarely understood the technical copy he was asked to read and felt he shouldn't be alone. We had just finished a production for GMC Trucks and Bud asked since this was the perfect setting could we film his Turbo Encabulator script. He was using an audio prompter referred to as "the ear". He was actually the pioneer of the ear. He was to deliver a live speech without a prompter. After struggling in his hotel room trying to commit to memory he went to plan B. He recorded it to a large Wollensak reel to reel recorder and placed it in the bottom of the podium. With a wired earplug he used it for the speech and the "ear" was invented. Today every on-camera spokesperson uses a variation of Bud's innovation. Dave Rondot (me) was the director and John Choate was the DP on this production. The first laugh at the end is mine. My hat's off to Bud a true talent."

Wer'e going on vacation next week to Hilton Head. I'm going to bring it with me for my sons and to play with and figure out at night.
That's cool, post a video of it in action!
 
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You know that thing is worthless without the plates. :D
 
It is one of the mythical Do Nothing Machines. Also known as a Standard Timing Model. Back in the old days when you had qualified mechanics and technicians out in the world and they were looking for a job they would go in to see the plant hiring manager and the plant engineer would sit them down in front of one of those things run it through a few cycles to show them that it did indeed work . Then they would lead them out and someone would scramble all the settings on the cams and linkages and then the prospective employee would have to make it run again...with a stopwatch behind them. No pressure. The old "Black Box Test" . Several large companies still use them. I recently started a new testing regimen for industrial mechanic candidates and the VP said...hey Ive got this thing in my office . It had gotten so bad before the economy collapsed that if you had a pulse and could fog a mirror I'd hire you , try you out and fire you within days if you were an idiot. Now there are actually qualified technicians out in the labor market so I get to be pickier.

Dang It, you had us good. My dad is a ME. specialty is DC motors. I brought it to him (my background is fluid physics) and we spent 45 minutes picking it apart based on the picture. Diagramed the hell out of it. In the end we couldn't figure out a result based on the picture. We couldn't figure out how a part would make it through.... Makes sense now. Doesn't do much, just runs. I called him up and had a good laugh. Thanks! He said they have similar tests but are made up of old machines that no longer work etc. for new hires.
 
Dang It, you had us good. My dad is a ME. specialty is DC motors. I brought it to him (my background is fluid physics) and we spent 45 minutes picking it apart based on the picture. Diagramed the hell out of it. In the end we couldn't figure out a result based on the picture. We couldn't figure out how a part would make it through.... Makes sense now. Doesn't do much, just runs. I called him up and had a good laugh. Thanks! He said they have similar tests but are made up of old machines that no longer work etc. for new hires.

Well this one does something. It moves a little block around :)

 
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