I feel like you did the right thing at the time, but it is your home. I wouldn't be letting them come back over. You're a better man than I am because if it was me, I would be escorting his ass out the door..
Disarmed in your own home?
- Thread starter Alabamacoastie
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I feel like you did the right thing at the time, but it is your home. I wouldn't be letting them come back over. You're a better man than I am because if it was me, I would be escorting his ass out the door..
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I think you did the right thing. Some people are afraid of everything. But i would never invite him over again. LOL
I mean wouldnt it be entertaining to teach your kids and his how to shoot? Nothing better than little susie going home all excited asking dad when she can go back to the range.
Kidding aside Good luck thats a tough spot but the tone he asked would have been my beef.
Kidding aside Good luck thats a tough spot but the tone he asked would have been my beef.
Thank you for your service. My son is a coastie, stationed at air station Elizabeth City NC.
Why are you so afraid in your own home?
Alternate wise-ass response:
How do you sleep?
All kidding aside, those really are questions people ask. They have very simple answers. I carry in my home because I spend most of my time in my home, people who want to do me harm can be at my door very quickly without me having much time to get a weapon from another room, my wife is in a wheel chair and can not move to a safer part of the house on her own, foxes and coons around here are known for having rabies and for biting people, the island has a history of drug related crime at times, and we have very large roaches.
I sleep at night with several loaded firearms easily accessible to me once I am awake. I do not have them positioned so that there is much of a chance that I can get hold of them while dreaming and do something unfortunate with them. I also have good locks on the doors and a very loud dog.
This was my first thought. And preferably something that makes a little more of a statement than a 365. Think 5” 1911 or N frame revolver.
Still there. Glad they are wasting their money on that. Probably all the App St pinko’s clap as they pass it.
The noble thing for him to do would be to tell you he was uncomfortable and ask you to put it away. If you didn't, he could tell the kids something's come up and they have to go home now. He didn't do the noble thing. I have never regretted the times I suppressed what I wanted to do and did the noble thing instead.
The two men didn't really have a relationship anyway and probably never will. I think I would just ask my wife to find a private moment to politely tell the other mom that:
The two men didn't really have a relationship anyway and probably never will. I think I would just ask my wife to find a private moment to politely tell the other mom that:
- I deferred to your demand in that moment only to preserve relationships that my family values.
- I won't carry when I visit your home.
- My guns are always either on me or locked up. Your family will not be in any danger from my guns when they are over here.
- I won't put it away next time. If that's unacceptable to you, then it would be best if you don't come over.
- I'd be pleased to have you join me at the range any time.
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That's possible, of course, but I'd put money on the notion that this person is just "trigger happy" insofar as being one of those folks who just can't wait for the next moment to be offended: so much so that it becomes a habituated reflex. Of course, I wasn't there ::shrug::
Winner, winner, chicken dinner. Offensive in a nice passive aggressive way.
How the heck did you make it out and find your way to a gun site? I guess there is always the exception that proves the rule.
I’m sure how you kept your composer for the wife and children is highly appreciated. I know it’s tough. Maybe over time you will convince the husband the importance of being prepared in this highly turbulent time. I’ve done many things I didn’t want to do for my families good.
If your wife goes to the range she should invite the guys wife. Wouldn’t it be amazing if she enjoyed it and came home telling about the experience? It would blow his mind. And in the end he would look like a wuss to his whole family.
If your wife goes to the range she should invite the guys wife. Wouldn’t it be amazing if she enjoyed it and came home telling about the experience? It would blow his mind. And in the end he would look like a wuss to his whole family.
I have no defense for the idiot husbands actions but all parents should question the folks that their children visit as to guns and their availability. No way should a child be allowed in a house where guns are not monitored.
I have read most (but not all) of the replies and I guess they must fit the personality of the poster and so be it. However, I would have asked him to repeat himself just to make certain that I heard him correctly and if I did I would have calmly and quietly told him he was free to leave if he didn't like the situation. At that point the ball was in his court, he could leave and tell his girls WHY they had to leave or he could just leave.
There will never be a point in my life when someone comes into my home and tells me what to do or how I should behave. I can provide references (wife's oldest sister) if needed. She tried it once but will never have another opportunity. The wife had her back up until I explained that she (wife) was free to go visit her but she could not come to my house again. The wife "reminded" me that it was half her house and I explained that we could split it, and everything else if that's the way she wanted it to end.
As far as making him a convert to gun ownership, your mountain to climb if you want but I guarantee he'll push you off the top while your celebrating..
There will never be a point in my life when someone comes into my home and tells me what to do or how I should behave. I can provide references (wife's oldest sister) if needed. She tried it once but will never have another opportunity. The wife had her back up until I explained that she (wife) was free to go visit her but she could not come to my house again. The wife "reminded" me that it was half her house and I explained that we could split it, and everything else if that's the way she wanted it to end.
As far as making him a convert to gun ownership, your mountain to climb if you want but I guarantee he'll push you off the top while your celebrating..
That is a conversation he should have with the neighbor.
First of all, I'm NEVER "disarmed" in my own home.
I've a kitchen full of properly maintained cutlery, tools of all kinds hither and yon, gardening tools, various sports stuff like baseball bats, pens & pencils, and sundry other weapons of opportunity.
Not to mention the knife I always carry.
The are various firearms in various places, too.
So disarming in this situation would really be a facade.
Not to mention I could shift my carry if I chose.
There's a line everybody needs to consider with respect to various situations like this...and that line isn't fixed due to circumstances.
And your actions may also decide whether you "shut down" your neighbor on the subject, or you leave open the possibility of future discussion/change in views.
Among other things.
Kudos.
I've a kitchen full of properly maintained cutlery, tools of all kinds hither and yon, gardening tools, various sports stuff like baseball bats, pens & pencils, and sundry other weapons of opportunity.
Not to mention the knife I always carry.
The are various firearms in various places, too.
So disarming in this situation would really be a facade.
Not to mention I could shift my carry if I chose.
There's a line everybody needs to consider with respect to various situations like this...and that line isn't fixed due to circumstances.
And your actions may also decide whether you "shut down" your neighbor on the subject, or you leave open the possibility of future discussion/change in views.
Among other things.
Kudos.
By the way...my sense of humor definitely extends to "baiting".
Time to start carrying my wife's "hobby drill", a small rechargeable drill similar to this in a "noticeable" way:
Time to start carrying my wife's "hobby drill", a small rechargeable drill similar to this in a "noticeable" way:
Excellent point. @Alabamacoastie next time invite him over and ensure him that all gun will be locked up in safes. Then when the moment is right draw blade and hold it to his neck. And with your best Jack Nicholson say, ‘here’s Johnny!”
I have read many of the responses, and agree with most. I think what got on my nerves the most was the tone in which he asked you to disarm. For example, we have two dogs in the house. The lady who was handling our foster/adopted sons case was deathly afraid of dogs and asked us nicely before she came over if we could lock them up while she was over. I was cool with that. Even though they are my babies and I hated putting them up for a bit, I understood. Now, what she >didnt< do is come in and demand they be shut up "or else!".
So, in your instance, the ultimatum tone would have irritated me to the point I probably would have asked him to just take his toys and go home. My kids will be better off not growing up with friends with parents that lack base manners and civility. Now, if he had simply said "Hey Bama, firearms make me a bit uncomfortable, and I am not overly comfortable with them around the kids. Would you mind locking it up when they are over?" then I would have been more sympathetic. I would have totally disagreed with him, but in my opinion, asking is different than demanding.
But maybe thats me...when I am asked politely, Ill just about do anything to make people happy/comfortable. But when it is demanded of me, not so much...or rather...not at all.
So, in your instance, the ultimatum tone would have irritated me to the point I probably would have asked him to just take his toys and go home. My kids will be better off not growing up with friends with parents that lack base manners and civility. Now, if he had simply said "Hey Bama, firearms make me a bit uncomfortable, and I am not overly comfortable with them around the kids. Would you mind locking it up when they are over?" then I would have been more sympathetic. I would have totally disagreed with him, but in my opinion, asking is different than demanding.
But maybe thats me...when I am asked politely, Ill just about do anything to make people happy/comfortable. But when it is demanded of me, not so much...or rather...not at all.
MacEntyre
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Booger, would you please put away your biting, verbose sarcasm while I am a member. It makes me uncomfortable, and I don't want you to do it around my friends. Thank you!
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I own guns, some loaded. If you can't deal with it too bad, don't come to my house.
I smoke in my house and on my property. If you can't deal with it, don't come over and breath my air.
Don't bring your attitude to my house and demand squat. I have an attitude too and you will be TOLD its my way or the highway! YOUR Choice.
When I go to others places its their rules and I respect their wishes.
I smoke in my house and on my property. If you can't deal with it, don't come over and breath my air.
Don't bring your attitude to my house and demand squat. I have an attitude too and you will be TOLD its my way or the highway! YOUR Choice.
When I go to others places its their rules and I respect their wishes.
I’m sure I’m not alone, @Alabamacoastie , I’m curious what you plan to do from here?
Ikarus1
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his Antifa and BLM buddies at work.
paid protestors don't work. That's why they can do what they do
TripleO7
Well-Known Member
Always been open about it. I think the NRA and Gadsden Flag and GunVote stickers on the back window of my truck is an indication of my interest in firearms. I was walking into the house after a range trip with a rifle case and range bag and a couple was walking by. The wife said "that's the guy with the guns" in a snotty disapproving tone. I felt like saying I wear ear pro and can still hear too, just to be a dick, but I just let it go. Not like I knew who they were anyway. Or cared.
OP
Alabamacoastie
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Puddle Pirate
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The issue occurred on Friday evening. When the family left, they took my daughters with them for Friday night sleepover (their daughters spent one night at our house the weekend before).
On Saturday morning, I went to their house to pick up my girls. Everyone was acting normal. The husband, wife, and I made small talk for about 20 minutes (in the driveway) while the kids played in the yard. Lots of laughing. Lots of smiling. I complimented their grass and trees. Nobody said anything about guns.
I was wearing the same shorts, with the same gun in the same cargo pocket. Either he didn't notice, or didn't care to bring it up in front of his wife (in his own yard) .
This morning, I told my wife that I started this thread on "the gun forum". I read some of your responses to her. She says, "thank you for the feedback".
We talked about it, and she doesn't want me to contact the husband or wife to initiate a convo about guns. She wants us to wait about a month and invite their girls over for another sleepover at our house and see if the other couple bring up guns. If so, I'll tell him that all my guns are locked up, blah, blah, blah.
My wife also asked me to carry IWB (or something smaller in front pocket) from now on, when friends are over, so that I don't scare any other moms or dads.
I never contact the husband or wife anyway. The husband and I have nothing in common except 4 little girls that are best friends. My wife and the other wife are friends and they text/ talk on the phone once or twice a week.
I'm sure the women will work it out. The girls can still be friends. That's the important thing. I don't care to be friends with the dad. All he talks about is books and indie music... He is a hippie and he knows it.
I think everything is cool, until we invite their kids over again. I'll give yall an update if anything changes...
You mentioned he didn't drink. That shouldn't matter other than you drinking at the pool with kids and a gun right? Maybe the beer and firearm tipped the neighbors good sense scale?
Make sure you invite a few of us over for their next visit. We’ll provide moral support. And maybe just a few offhand remarks.
I hate to beat an ol dead marxist horse past glue but think about this on you next encounter with a "controller". I had the opportunity to work around an "alphabet" manager recently and my crew drew my attention to a conversation that was going on inside of the structure. This fella was the real deal complete with a glowing lefty profile of said "alphabet" company on the interwebs. Im not proud of snooping but the words were shocking to all that were there and Im a lil ashamed....just a lil. The "gun control" issue was mentioned along with other causes the left find dear and most here would find offensive to our God given rights and all that.
To make this shorter Ill say the "gun issue" along with the rest were just checked off in the dialogue as a matter of agenda. There was no thought to peoples rights at all and the whole exercise was a checklist to be fulfilled as a matter of fact. Folks rights will surely not be tolerated because they are not on the list....period! The controllers have their orders and there will be no reasoning with these folks....thats not on the list.
In the future, if you get a chance to put them in their place please do. That fella that got all offended over an inanimate object cares little about the gun, he just wanted to show you his control. The gun was just the handy mechanism. You know your own AO but I would get the biggest OC unit I could strap from hip to ankle and wear it about once a week to walk down to get the mail; I hear Southern groundhogs have no mercy!
Rooster
To make this shorter Ill say the "gun issue" along with the rest were just checked off in the dialogue as a matter of agenda. There was no thought to peoples rights at all and the whole exercise was a checklist to be fulfilled as a matter of fact. Folks rights will surely not be tolerated because they are not on the list....period! The controllers have their orders and there will be no reasoning with these folks....thats not on the list.
In the future, if you get a chance to put them in their place please do. That fella that got all offended over an inanimate object cares little about the gun, he just wanted to show you his control. The gun was just the handy mechanism. You know your own AO but I would get the biggest OC unit I could strap from hip to ankle and wear it about once a week to walk down to get the mail; I hear Southern groundhogs have no mercy!
Rooster
That will not be the end of it, you will probably hear something to the effect “We don’t feel comfortable with our kids going to a home where people carry guns, so you can’t carry any time our kids are there”
At that point I’d probably say “well we will miss them, take care”, you may want to prep the family that the friendship is in jeopardy of their dad pushes the issue.
But then again I’m known to be abrasive and what not.
Edit: OP you made the right call at that moment, if you had told the dude to pound sand and stood your ground the dickweed probably would have ended up making you out to be the bad guy as he gathered up his family and made a scene, you’re kids would have ended up blaming you for the ending Of the friendship and that’s no bueno.
The encounter definitely bothers you or you wouldn’t have started the thread, so in all seriousness I’d sit down with your wife and come up with a game plan, you guys have to be on the same page, I don’t know your wife but there was a time that mine would have told me to “be the bigger man and ignore the situation and don’t carry the gun around them”, after 28 years of marriage, she is on the same page with me about firearms, So you making a stand may cause stress in your relationship if you choose to die on this hill, because you guys disagree on the way to handle it .
At that point I’d probably say “well we will miss them, take care”, you may want to prep the family that the friendship is in jeopardy of their dad pushes the issue.
But then again I’m known to be abrasive and what not.
Edit: OP you made the right call at that moment, if you had told the dude to pound sand and stood your ground the dickweed probably would have ended up making you out to be the bad guy as he gathered up his family and made a scene, you’re kids would have ended up blaming you for the ending Of the friendship and that’s no bueno.
The encounter definitely bothers you or you wouldn’t have started the thread, so in all seriousness I’d sit down with your wife and come up with a game plan, you guys have to be on the same page, I don’t know your wife but there was a time that mine would have told me to “be the bigger man and ignore the situation and don’t carry the gun around them”, after 28 years of marriage, she is on the same page with me about firearms, So you making a stand may cause stress in your relationship if you choose to die on this hill, because you guys disagree on the way to handle it .
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MacEntyre
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Ok, I'm over it... you may continue as before.
