Loosing my best friend.

nchunt101

nchunt101

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Long story short my best friend's(closer than family) PTSD is killing him. Ever since he wrecked his bike in November his life has been a downward spiral. He has been in jail since May and had been in a veteran only program/block that offered counseling etc. His sister told me yesterday he has been moved to gen pop for fighting. I know none of this is my fault but I feel I should/could have done more to help him fight the demons that are the result of multiple deployments as a Ranger. I am not excusing his actions but Trevor no longer has an off switch and has lost a huge part of his soul. His career is gone as is his family and I have the feeling he will kill himself the first chance he gets. I have never served but I have lost people I cared for deeply and I am not sure I am man enough the deal with loosing him. Sorry to ramble and if this post is disjointed---Really at a loss and have no clue what I can do to help him.
 
Praying for you and Trevor to find peace.
 
Prayers to you and Trevor. Sometimes we do everything we can but its still not enough. You cannot carry that burden when it is clearly not yours to carry.
 
I have been where you are, under different circumstances. It sucks.
Prayers for you, and your friend. Try not to internalize guilt, it is not yours to bear.
 
I’m not really the prayers sort, but I wish you and your friend well. I sympathize with yoiu for being in this situation. Undoubtedly it is difficult but there is little you can do but to love him and be his friend.

Unfortunately his is an example of where the prison / legal system is ill equipped to help those with needs.
 
It's quite disheartening to hear about somebody who served this Country who is now in this situation. Prayers to all.
 
Curious as to why a motorcycle wreck is the start of his troubles....possibly overdrugged? As for suicide, if he's fighting he's not the kind to off his life.
 
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Hate to hear this, hope your friend gets the help he needs.
 
Dale Flinchum said:
Curious as to why a motorcycle wreck is the start of his troubles....possibly overdrugged? As for suicide, if he's fighting he's not the kind to off his life.
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Thanks for the thoughts guys. I generally don't like to ask/bring this up but I can't help but think I should have seen how bad the situation was/is. Something inside of him has broken and I have never seen someone so empty.
He suffered serious brain damage in the wreck which caused him to have violent episodes. Trevor had some problems before the wreck but everything got ten times worse afterwards. The past few deployments had been rough on him as well. It had gotten bad enough that his family was scared of him and I was about the only person who could calm him down.
 
skiles said:
It's quite disheartening to hear about somebody who served this Country who is now in this situation. Prayers to all.
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Going through this has been eye opening. I have never served and am conflicted about saying this but it seems like the millitary could give a rats ass about individual soldiers.
 
nchunt101 said:
Going through this has been eye opening. I have never served and am conflicted about saying this but it seems like the millitary could give a rats ass about individual soldiers.
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I haven't served either but that is my impression.
 
I'm a little hard nosed about these situations. You aren't doing your friend any favors by letting him wallow in self pity. He voluntarily signed up to be a warrior and he needs to be a warrior now. Giving up is not an option.

The best advice I ever got when the redhead dumped me was " get over it, we're getting tired of hearing about it".
 
Sad to read about this young man's problems. There are no short term solutions that I know of and probably no long term either. Lucky he has a friend that has helped him stay out of trouble but a person in his condition will probably have to stay locked up for a long time if not forever.

The military has always been glorified to aid the recruitment of the young but most don't have a clue what they are getting themselves into and too many are not able to readjust to life here at home after the shock of inhumanity they witness as soldiers. Praise those that help the sick in mind, with time most can find a peaceful existence.
 
I can empathize with you with losing a friend man I know its rough. I had my best friend in the world who start drinking and partying and became an alcoholic at a very young age. I was always close to his family and his mom would always send me messages asking me to help. But at some point there is just nothing you can do. Jrgreen is right all you can do is help him face the hard reality that he has to be willing to face the new challenges with the same warrior mentality. Sobriety and life after service is sometimes the worst part of life and you will never have the same brother hood with another group of people.
 
J R Green said:
I'm a little hard nosed about these situations. You aren't doing your friend any favors by letting him wallow in self pity. He voluntarily signed up to be a warrior and he needs to be a warrior now. Giving up is not an option.

The best advice I ever got when the redhead dumped me was " get over it, we're getting tired of hearing about it".
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You are 100% right. I realize I can't protect him from himself but the situation has gotten beyond frustrating.
 
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