My condolences for the loss of your friend and Brother in Law. He’s at peace, now you need to put yourself at peace with it. I know, easier said than done. I feel for you about the family thing. We go through this every time something happens in my wife’s family. One of her brothers just passed in March, another hasn’t talked to anyone in her family in about 10 years ( he’s a real POS!) and her sister is a raving lunatic who wants to control everything and everyone.