Cancer victim care package?

Snal~

Snal~

I Run A Tight Shipwreck (Tragic Boating Accident)
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I've never had anyone close to me go through this, but a high school friend is battling liver and bone cancer. This was just diagnosed last week, and we were close in high school, but out of touch since then as he went into the Air Force.
I'd like to put together a care package for him, but I'm not sure what to include.
If any of you have gone through chemotherapy, or have experience with this type of cancer, can you tell me what might be best to include in a care package for him? Things that might help him through the chemo, or something that might just brighten his day?
We haven't seen each other in almost 40 years, but we were tight in school, and FB friends for a few years . Don't want to slam him with a here I am, and here you are, meet up under these circumstances, but I want to do what I can for him, and maybe ease into a meet-up if he's up for it later.
 
Jello and Ice Pops help with mouth sores from certain chemos, and also let you get something in your stomach when you feel like puking.
PS Mild soaps for cleaning, your whole body is going to feel like hell.
Plastic utensils. My chemos made metal utensils have a weird taste. I took plastic ones in my purse for eating out.
 
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A guy that I worked with got bone cancer. His treatment included a year or so of almost complete isolation after they zapped his bone marrow. I can’t ask him for any ideas, he survived but we lost touch again.
 
These are some things that we gave to 2 different older family members during chemo.
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When a close friend surprisingly had cancer and went through chemo in his early 30’s it was more about occupying his mind while he couldn’t do anything physical like we usually did. So video games, restaurant gift cards (or just dinner out together), and very light house projects were key.
 
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Don’t know what chemo drug they’ll be giving him, but I know of three things that I found useful…

Gloves, for handling cold stuff out of the fridge or freezer. Contact with cold objects exacerbated the neuropathy.

Fleece neck gaiter I could pull up over my nose/mouth. Breathing in cold air gave me a painful “pins and needles” feeling in my throat.

Heating pad for my arm. My infusions were
given through a peripheral IV. The pain/neuropathy in my arm after infusion was fairly stout…the heating pad helped alot.
 
Tagged this one to watch.............just because you CFF guys are the kind I like to have as friends when times like these appear in life.

I appreciate you.
 
CZfool68 said:
There are no good answers. Just offer to be there for whatever he needs. Even it means your are the punching bag. IMO there are no hard fast rules. This crap is brutal. Just be human.
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I respectfully disagree; and, only because someone I know who survived cancer was told before discharge from hospital they would need a shower head on a flexible hose kinda deal. I got their house keys from their spouse, raced ahead of them and their driver, snagged everything I needed and had it installed before they got home.

TO THIS DAY, that is all they talk about (they were in the hospital for 28 days and all the human contact in the world - and they had plenty - couldn’t compare to that first shower (which would not have been possible without that thingamajig.

Speaking from experience, OP a is on the RIGHT track.
 
Also going through treatment his immune system will be hit hard. With COVID being around he will be someone who will need to be very careful about who he interacts with if anyone outside of his immediate family. A phone call just checking couple times a week might be something to help if it’s just to talk or ask if he and his family need anything. I know a couple immune compromised older people who are going stir crazy from being “careful” for a year and a half and just talking with them in their yard at proper distance for 5-10 minutes puts a huge smile on their face. Isolation ain’t good for anyone … especially someone going through what he is.
 
Catfish said:
You'll need to go shopping in one of the "free" states.
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noway2 said:
If you can get them, THC gummies helped my mother when she went through chemo. They’re legal in some states.
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A lot of older folks in states where it is legal are finding great relief in a little bit of edible herbal therapy
Just make sure everybody knows the doses they should be taking. you may think you can eat a whole candy bar... but when you look into it you find out it's 12 doses and every little chocolate square is enough for 2...
that's not a good surprise to get. i am, of course, speaking on behalf of a friend.

but I've had some family members decide that a little bit of thc is far better than any of the medications they're prescribed for the many little things that ail them.
 
Dale Gribble said:
Don’t know what chemo drug they’ll be giving him, but I know of three things that I found useful…

Gloves, for handling cold stuff out of the fridge or freezer. Contact with cold objects exacerbated the neuropathy.

Fleece neck gaiter I could pull up over my nose/mouth. Breathing in cold air gave me a painful “pins and needles” feeling in my throat.

Heating pad for my arm. My infusions were
given through a peripheral IV. The pain/neuropathy in my arm after infusion was fairly stout…the heating pad helped alot.
Click to expand...
Ditto on the gloves, but because the cold caused intense pain.
Good insulated leather driving type ones worked for me.
 
A good joke book and maybe a gag gift. It's too easy to focus on the cancer and forget the person.

Also, this book is one of the best books for the family and friends to understand a little bit of what it's like and how to help. Maybe read this yourself. The person with cancer will like it too, because it shows, someone gets it and actually understands. I taught from this book.
51XEBfC5fcL._SY291_BO1,204,203,200_QL40_FMwebp_.jpg


Help Me Live, Revised: 20 Things People with Cancer Want You to Know: Hope, Lori: 9781587611490: Amazon.com: Books

Help Me Live, Revised: 20 Things People with Cancer Want You to Know [Hope, Lori] on Amazon.com. *FREE* shipping on qualifying offers. Help Me Live, Revised: 20 Things People with Cancer Want You to Know
www.amazon.com



My first wife passed from cancer and I spent 8yrs working in a cancer center.
 
I went thru chemo it was experimental so I was given 10 times the needed dosage, needless to say, it damn near killed me but it did get rid of the cancer. To be honest there isn't much anyone can do other than letting them know you're there and care and want to help. The one thing that made my blood boil was when people would say I know how you feel, I know its simple words of sympathy but that one phrase grated on me more than anything.
 
On @Millie ’s plastic utensils suggestion I’d like to add that the plastic camping utensils from Wal Mart for example worked well for my mother when she was going through Chemo. They’re under a dollar for a 3 piece set I think and are dishwasher safe and much more durable than any disposable.
 
have relatives that have gone through chemo, they've been told to mix protein powder in with pudding (and similar foods) to maximize nutrient intake
 
Diablos said:
have relatives that have gone through chemo, they've been told to mix protein powder in with pudding (and similar foods) to maximize nutrient intake
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When my mother went through chemo, certain types of meat became almost unbearable in terms of taste. Actually a lot of food did. Some chemo causes metal mouth and other ill effects, while some do not. Consequently, if this does happen, then if they can find a way to introduce more protein in a palatable manner it would be a good move.
 
When my dad had bladder cancer, his hair fell out, and he’d never been one for wearing hats. I bought him a kubota tractor hat cause he had a kubota tractor and he wore that hat until he died. Also, when he was sick, and didn’t have an appetite and was losing weight because of everything, the only thing that helped him get his appetite back, was the marijuana. It didn’t make him feel any better, but it made him not give a shit, and it made him hungry. YMMV
 
I know it's not a gift bag or anything but maybe get them a relief band or have a couple of your mutual friends get one for them.
www.reliefband.com

Reliefband®

Reliefband® is drug free, non-drowsy, FDA cleared wearable technology for the prevention and treatment of nausea and vomiting associated with motion sickness, morning sickness, chemotherapy and as an adjunct to antiemetics in post surgery.
www.reliefband.com www.reliefband.com
 
DrScaryGuy said:
A lot of older folks in states where it is legal are finding great relief in a little bit of edible herbal therapy
Just make sure everybody knows the doses they should be taking. you may think you can eat a whole candy bar... but when you look into it you find out it's 12 doses and every little chocolate square is enough for 2...
that's not a good surprise to get. i am, of course, speaking on behalf of a friend.

but I've had some family members decide that a little bit of thc is far better than any of the medications they're prescribed for the many little things that ail them.
Click to expand...

5-10 mgs is a good starting point. 20-30 mgs if you are used to edibles.
 
My mother in law enjoyed puzzle books, crossword, word search books it kept her mind busy during treatments. Also had, Netflix, kindle, account to watch movies. A co-worker said the gloves were a big help, and zylactin for the mouth sores
 
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