Last time I was reintroduced to yellow jackets was when I was cleaning out underneath my upper deck. For some reason, my wife had lattice installed on all three sides, leaving two spots I have to essentially crawl through to get out. By “had lattice installed” is saying my dumb ass did it because she wanted it done and I didn’t think all the scenarios through when leaving the openings. Still her fault, though.
Anyway, I was under there and moved an old umbrella, getting ready to throw it out one of the 2 openings when, bam, felt a “bite”. I looked down at the site and there was a yellow jacket, flipping me the bird, as he sadistically jabbed his stinger into me again. I swatted his ass but forgot that he had friends. Suddenly, all these little kamikaze a-holes started lighting me up. The closest escape hatch was now blocked by their nest (inside the umbrella), so I had to dive out the other one without knocking myself out on the stairs that were overhead, make a hard left, open a 5’ gate and shuffle to the water hose. I looked like one of those toy drums from Karate Kid 3019 (the one with the swinging arms) as I tried to beat the attack off. Luckily, a neighbor saw what was happening and, after he stopped laughing, he turned the hose on and got the bastards to leave me alone. I stopped counting at around 30 stings but there were a ton more. I burned the umbrella and napalmed the ground underneath the deck, twice, before I would go back underneath.