Long_Hunter
Sufficient Speed, Acceptable Drag
2A Bourbon Hound 2024
2A Bourbon Hound OG
Charter Life Member
Benefactor
Supporting Member
The teacher gave her 5th grade class an assignment: get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories.
Kathy said, “My father’s a farmer and we have a lot of egg laying hens. One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of the pickup when we hit a bump in the road and the eggs went flying and broke and made a mess.”
“And what’s the moral of the story?” asked the teacher.
“Don’t put all your eggs in one basket!”
“Very good,” said the teacher. “Now Lucy?”
“Our family are farmers too, but we raise chickens for the meat market. We had a dozen eggs one time, but when they hatched we only got ten live chicks. And the moral to this story is, don’t count your chickens before they’re hatched.”
“That’s a fine story Lucy,” she continued. “Johnny, do you have story to share?”
“Oh, yes ma’am, my daddy told me this story about my Uncle Bob. Uncle Bob was a Green Beret in Vietnam and his helicopter got hit. He had to crash land in enemy territory and all he had was a bottle of whiskey, a machine gun, and a machete. He drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn’t break and then he landed right in the middle of 100 enemy troops. He killed 70 of them with the machine gun until it ran out of bullets, then he killed 20 more with the machete till the blade broke and then he killed the last ten with his bare hands.”
“Good Heavens,” said the teacher, “What kind of moral did your daddy tell you from that horrible story?”
“Don’t mess with Uncle Bob when he’s been drinking.”
Kathy said, “My father’s a farmer and we have a lot of egg laying hens. One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of the pickup when we hit a bump in the road and the eggs went flying and broke and made a mess.”
“And what’s the moral of the story?” asked the teacher.
“Don’t put all your eggs in one basket!”
“Very good,” said the teacher. “Now Lucy?”
“Our family are farmers too, but we raise chickens for the meat market. We had a dozen eggs one time, but when they hatched we only got ten live chicks. And the moral to this story is, don’t count your chickens before they’re hatched.”
“That’s a fine story Lucy,” she continued. “Johnny, do you have story to share?”
“Oh, yes ma’am, my daddy told me this story about my Uncle Bob. Uncle Bob was a Green Beret in Vietnam and his helicopter got hit. He had to crash land in enemy territory and all he had was a bottle of whiskey, a machine gun, and a machete. He drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn’t break and then he landed right in the middle of 100 enemy troops. He killed 70 of them with the machine gun until it ran out of bullets, then he killed 20 more with the machete till the blade broke and then he killed the last ten with his bare hands.”
“Good Heavens,” said the teacher, “What kind of moral did your daddy tell you from that horrible story?”
“Don’t mess with Uncle Bob when he’s been drinking.”